Tag: Pokemon

getoutofmyheadcharles:

thebatmanchild:

athagazagoraphobic:

invisicanada:

About three things I was absolutely positive. First, I had a pokemon. Second, there was a part of me – and I didn’t know how dominant that part might be – that wanted to be the very best, like no one ever was. Third, Gary Oak was unconditionally and irrevocably a douchenozzle.

Reblogging for the comment

How old are you? 

“ten”

How long have you been ten?

“…”

“I know what you are.”

“Say it.”

“A Pokemon Master.”

sexhaver:

probably the scariest thing about Pokemon is that there are canonically no regular animals in the world. think about that. whalers hunted Wailords for their oil and blubber. Magikarp are fried up and served for dinner and once every few months a Magikarp hatchery probably has a disaster where one of them accidentally evolves and destroys the entire facility. sometimes a sewer pipe will get clogged and they’ll send a repairman down to look into it and he shines his flashlight into the darkness only to illuminate hundreds or pairs of Grimer and Muk eyes and he prays to God before remembering that God is a pokemon too

garpusstuff:

most-depressed-optimist:

diamond-dangeresque:

homestuckorbust:

neon-squiggles:

donechesters:

pete860:

holy shit

#people underestimate how scary as fuck Pokemon would be if it were a movie not a children’s cartoon

I haven’t agreed with a tag more

Beedrill is a 3 foot bee. FUCK THAT NOISE

To really illustrate how fucking terrifying Pokemon can be:

Landfill workers having to deal with Garbodors and Trubbish, probably aggressive since these Pokemon need to be reprocessed (they’re still literal trash at the end of the day). Oil spills create hordes of seabound Muk and Grimers. Industrial towns crawling with the aforementioned living slime Pokemon, but also Koffing and Weezing making the air that much worse.

Voltorbs and Electrodes encountering people by surprise and doing what they do best, causing grievous harm to anyone within their Explosion’s range. Like landmines, but they can move, is what I’m saying. Not to mention any time a group of Magnemite passing through an area… good luck getting a signal from your phone, or your tech even working. God help you if a Magneton or Magnezone is in there… and Electric-types like to congregate towards electric plants and such, so one badly-timed Thunderbolt…

Rattattas and Raticates and Patrats, with their massive teeth, causing terrible bite-based injuries to the poor kid that might have been throwing rocks at them moments ago. And remember that flock of Spearows that Ash pissed off really early on in the anime? Imagine that, but with injuries, blood, and the like being more visible. Chunks of hair, flesh, and so on torn right off and eaten right there. Yikes. Zubats are far more aggressive than most real life bats, and Golbats probably wouldn’t be afraid to pop your eardrums.

Poochyenas might be cute, but they’re still based on wolfdogs, and those things are aggressive as hell in the wild. I’d be worried for anyone who lives in an area where wolves are a thing. Foxes, even worse: you’ll be dealing with fire-breathing Vulpix and the sometimes more malevolent Ninetails.

Got kids? Better watch out for them, since Ghost-types prey on the more innocent ones, particularly Driflooms. Litwick groups basically mean death, and even the odd-shaped rock might actually be a Spiritomb waiting to prey on you. Hope you’ve been taking care of your toys, otherwise one of them might become a Shuppet or Banette. Gengars can prowl within your shadows and, with a mouth that big, swallow you whole. Yamasks and Cofragigus are a constant life-threat to archaeologists.

Like, I literally haven’t gotten to the massive, fire- or energy-breathing dragons, the dangerous sea serpents, or the horrific beasts yet, or they screwed-up deities. I am literally covering things you can find in your backyard or find while at work.

Pokemon is fucked up.

I think Hollywood disregards how much they could make off of a PG-13 or R rated Pokemon movie directed towards adults. Like, seriously, all the people who saw the first generation rise? They’re in their 20′s and 30′s. My 25 year old roommate is gonna be taking part in a tournament with his friends (all about the same age) in a few weeks, costs $20 to participate and winner takes all. This is adults only. I’m just saying, I would definitely put out the money to see a live-action, mature audience Pokemon movie. 

Yeah, I wouldn’t want to come up against a Darumaka in the wild.