“I don’t know maybe…not sure what I’d be doin’ without Bookman practically adopting me.” The redhead shrugged, that was an odd thing to just bring up. “Why ya askin’?”
“I can see your point.” The redhead nodded, a small smile gracing his lips. Their pasts made them who they were and Allen was a good person. He couldn’t imagine him any other way. Just wished he didn’t have to suffer so much. “Though honestly I’m up in the air about accepting to become a Bookman apprentice again…”
Allen was a bit shocked, while Lavi often complained about the work, Allen had gotten the impression that he really did enjoy becoming a Bookman.
“Do you… wish you were something else? Or someone else?” Allen asked curiously.
“I don’t know maybe…not sure what I’d be doin’ without Bookman practically adopting me.” The redhead shrugged, that was an odd thing to just bring up. “Why ya askin’?”
He had a point there, though Lavi knew he personally wouldn’t be willing to sign up for any wars without good reason. But would he chose being a Bookman after knowing everything he does now? That was a good question. Even if there were days he wanted out of all of it…would he do it again? Besides the wars and Bookman’s sometimes unfairness and the whole clan rules of no attachments, he liked the travel, the knowledge, the cultures, and everything else like it. He loved those parts. “Now I;m wondering myself…”
“But why wouldn’t you change it?” He had to admit he was curious. Would he really let himself be cursed again?
“Well… If I did change it, and made it so I had actually had a family and such… it would mean I wasn’t born with this Innocence. I wouldn’t have met Mana, or joined the Order to meet you, and everyone else. I would have had a normal life… but maybe it wouldn’t have been happier than the life I have now.”
“Its because of all the bad things that happened, that I was able to appreciate Mana for what he gave me. Because of what happened to him… I was able to appreciate what I could do as an Exorcist, to save the souls trapped in Akuma, and to save people. And I’m able to appreciate you, and everyone else at the Order, for being so kind to me… well, everyone except Kanda.” Allen smiled a bit. “He could probably use some kind of fate change to make him less of a jerk.”
“I don’t know maybe…not sure what I’d be doin’ without Bookman practically adopting me.” The redhead shrugged, that was an odd thing to just bring up. “Why ya askin’?”
“I was just thinking…” Allen trailed off, unsure how to explain. “I find myself wishing I could change my own fate… but I feel that the only way to change the outcome is to change what has happened in the past, change who you are.” He sighed, he probably wasn’t making any sense.
“If given the choice to change my fate, to start over… between this life and a life where I had not been an Exorcist, I’m not sure if I would chose to do anything differently.”
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