glumshoe:

kuttithevangu:

glumshoe:

“Ahh, detective, I see you have fallen for my trap. It’s a pity it had to end this way. I knew you would taste that mysterious white powder you found at the crime scene to confirm its identity. I understand… you were trying to look cool in front of your partner. You must have realized by now that I simply laced table sugar with an incredibly powerful neurotoxin. As you die, consider this a victory for responsible investigation, and an educational moment for your young partner. She will not make your mistake and will use appropriate methods and tools to identify unknown substances, not her goddamn tongue, you fool.”

Special Agent Fox Mulder, his mouth stuffed full of crimes: wait what

“Mulder! You’re voring the evidence!”